Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Rhubarb...People really eat this stuff?

I baked 2 rhubarb pies today for Miss Roberta. Miss Roberta called me last night and said she had some rhubarb, but didn't want to make the pies. She always calls me like this, it's pretty funny: She'll bring me all the ingredients, all the baking vessels...and then try to give me money. She's so cute.

Rhubarb is a pie that I have never made. After I scrounged Grandma's recipe box for the proper recipe, I decided it might be fun to document this process with a camera, and see if maybe this could be what my blog becomes...Confused? See here.

So here we go...Rhubarb pies ala Amy.
This is what Miss Roberta gave me, she even washed it and cut it up...It's hard to read, but she labeled it like this: "4 Cup's Rub" Well, crap. Grandma's recipe calls for 4 Cup's Rub for 1 pie. Well, Miss Roberta's pies will be a little skimpy.
It's a really pretty...uh, is it a vegetable or fruit? Well, either way, it's about to become 2 pies. I put it in a colander: because Grandma's cryptic recipe said to "pour boiling water over it. drain" I chose 2 cups.
While that's draining, we need pie crust. I already had pie crusts in the freezer, so if this post works out, I'll do a whole post dedicated to my pie crust process...for now, let's just look at the pretty pictures (and my new rolling pin). This recipe calls for a double crust...here's the bottom:

Isn't it awesome? I broke my other one. I break everything.

EASE the crust into the pie plate. EASE! Don't force! It will shrink. How do I know this? From experience, dude. From experience.

Okay, Ladies and Gentlemen: We have come to the portion of our program when our dedicated Blogger forgot to document part of the process. I'm sure that those of you who know our blogger personally are fully aware of her forgetful nature, lack-of-attention-to-details, and her ability to run off track easily. Evidence therein, check.
So, yeah, I forgot to take a picture of me mixing 1 1/2 cups of sugar with 1/2 cup of flour...see it in your mind, then move to the next picture:

Sprinkle the bottom of the pie crust with the flour/sugar mixture. I didn't measure, I just sprinkled. Probably about 1/4 cup.

Back to the 4 cup's of Rub: Mix the remaining flour/sugar mixture with the drained rhubarb.
"Mix, Mix. Stir, stir. I married young. It's all a blur." Wow, I really miss "Kids in the Hall".

This picture doesn't move us forward in the recipe, I just like it so I put it in.

At the bottom of the bowl, there will be some flour/sugar that didnt stick to the rhubarb...I just sprinkled that on top:
Then "Dot with Butter"...the single greatest line in the history of recipes. I use margarine.

You'll notice that I don't mess around with that "dot with butter" thing...I'm "Go Big or Go Home" with everything I do.

Now the top crust (geeze, can we get this thing in the oven already??):
I took a few shots of this, I think it's really cool.

Cut off the excess crust and flute the edges:

My fluting technique was taught to me by Judy Decker, our high school home ec teacher. I don't remember anything else from that class, but by golly, I remember how to flute a pie.

I tried to take a picture of me fluting the pie: I balanced my camera on a box of Cheez-its, lined myself up, then tried to push the button on the camera with my nose. No workie. I'll show ya how I do it when I hire a photographer. Or invest in a tripod.
Remember I said Miss Roberta needed 2 pies?

As I said, this recipe is for one pie, but Miss Roberta didn't have any more rhubarb. So this will be twice as much filling in one pie when you make it. Make sense? Yeah, me neither.

Egg wash coming up: I have two eggs here, but you only need one.

I really love eggs. I love the way they look like this...Yeah, I'm pretty weird. There's also about 2 tablespoons of water in there. Again, you only need one egg, and probably 1 tbsp of water.
Then you brush the tops of the pie (this makes them all pretty when they bake):

Awkward shot: I'm brushing left-handed and trying to take the picture with my right hand...I have GOT to get a photographer.
Then sprinkle with sugar:

We are ready for the oven! I put everything on baking sheets...Mostly to protect the bottom of my oven, but also to protect my food: My oven sometimes decides it wants to scorch the bottom of my pies. Sometimes. Never sure when. Unpredictable oven <---My Least Favorite thing. So I just put everything on an old jellyroll pan:

Uckie, right? I baked lots and lots and lots and lots of stuff on this pan. Then decided to invest in a new shiny one. This one became my catcher-of-pies-running-over/scorch-preventer.

Bake bake bake. Grandma's recipe says this: "bake in high oven for 15 minutes, then turn down to medium and bake till browned"...I translated to this: 450 for 15 minutes, then turn it down to 350 until browned...mine took 40 minutes or so. I don't time anything, I rely on smell to tell me when stuff is done.

Ready to see what they look like?

Girl, I just love me a beautiful pie. I could stare at this for hours.

I wish I could cut a piece to show you, but alas, these are Miss Roberta's pies. I have to deliver them at 4pm today. If I'm not there by 4:05, she will start calling my mom.
Here's the recipe if ya'll wanna make your own:
Rhubarb Pie
Makes 1 double crust pie
4 cups chopped rhubarb
1 1/2 cups sugar
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
Butter for dotting
1 recipe for double crust pie
Preheat oven to 450 degrees.
Place chopped rhubarb in colander, pour 2 cups of boiling water over and allow to drain.
Combine sugar and flour, sprinkle bottom of pie crust with 1/4 cup of mixture. Mix remaining sugar/flour mixture with drained rhubarb, heap into pie crust on top of sugar/flour mixture. Any remaining sugar/flour mixture may be sprinkled on top of rhubarb. Dot with butter, cover with top crust.
Bake in oven for 15 minutes, then lower temperature to 350 and continue baking for 40 - 45 minutes.


  1. So damn funny. I like your dramatic reading of G.O.'s recipes. Or, receipts.

  2. lol Thanks guys...G.O.'s recipe box is a challenge. Her recipe for meatloaf calls for "30 cents of hamburger".

  3. Hm. Even though it snowed here last night, there is already rhubarb coming up beside my garden. I will have tons of rhubarb -- and the rhubarb I chopped and froze last year is still in the deep freeze. Oh oh! Maybe I'll try my hand at your pies.

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  5. Amy,
    Be thankful that you have at least part of a clue for her recipies! My great Grandma Haga's recipes only had ingredients.. no measurements or cook/bake times or temps!!! Sometimes no Title to know what you were about to attempt to cook! LOL I absolutely love your blogs!! Keep them coming!
    (The last post I re-read and decided I couldn't spell.. LOL sorry)